Faith

Today I ended up on Seth Adam Smith's blog reading his posting about faith.   This quote from his blog made me rethink about my experiences (trials) over the last few years.  While I have struggled through years of church in another language, feeling starved for spirituality and feeling like my faith was diminishing quickly, I wondered why when I need spiritual experiences most am I in a place where I don't understand them while they are going on all around me.  His blog quote says:

Doubt—opposition to our faith—actually gives us the ability to strengthen our faith. So keep in mind that if Lehi’s formula of opposition is true, then opposition will grow in proportion to our faith. Ironically, the more we increase in faith, the more our faith will be tested and opposed. It’s a law of nature that must be observed.

Maybe instead of my faith slipping, it was just me being pushed to greater faith because of greater opposition.  Maybe my faith was stronger than I realized.  I really liked this posting I read on Seth Adam Smith's blog, it's a good read.

No woman can afford...

Today I am studying D & C 25 which is a revelation received by Joseph Smith to his wife Emma, however in the last verse (16) it says, "And verily, verily, I say unto you, that this is my voice unto all. Amen." Although is was received for Emma, it applies to all.

In Doctrine and Covenants 25 verse 2 it reads: "A revelation I give unto you concerning my will; and if thou art faithful and walk in the paths of virtue before me, I will preserve thy life, and thou shalt receive an inheritance in Zion."

This verse caught my eye since recently I was reading about doing the will of the Lord instead of my own will. And I'm currently trying to figure out what the Lord's will is for me.  This verse clearly states what the Lord's will is for us as his children.  This next quote I read in my online Doctrine and Covenants independent study class.

"In very large measure each of us holds the key to the blessings of the Almighty upon us. If we wish the blessing, we must pay the price. A part of that price lies in being faithful. Faithful to what? Faithful to ourselves, to the very best that is within us. No woman can afford to demean herself, to belittle herself, to downgrade her abilities or her capacities. Let each be faithful to the great, divine attributes that are within her. Be faithful to the gospel. Be faithful to the Church. We have all about us those who are seeking to undermine it, to look for weaknesses in its early leaders, to find fault with its programs, to speak critically of it. I give you my testimony that it is the work of God and those who speak against it are speaking against him.

Be faithful to him. He is the one true source of your strength. He is your Father in Heaven. He lives. He hears and answers prayers. Be faithful to God." (Gordon B. Hinckley, Ensign, Nov. 1984, p. 90; or Conference Report, Oct. 1989, p. 111.)

I love this quote in so many ways:

1)    When he says "No woman can afford to demean herself, to belittle herself, to downgrade her abilities or her capacities."  This fills me with strength to do one the things that I have been struggling to do all these years--Wake early, before kids, and study the scriptures, for one.  I can always find an excuse as to why this won't work on any given day, but it doesn't matter, because I feel like this has been a commandment given to me and regardless of what time my kids fall asleep (11 pm last night) or what time I finally got to bed (12:40 am) I still need that time of peace and quiet to study and hopefully listen to the will of the Lord.  I love how President Hinckley counsels me that I can't afford to downgrade my ability. I am capable of waking that early and studying and the more I do it the more it will be a habit and become easier.  And so I will set my alarm for 5 am again (since my spicy toddler wakes between 6 and 6:30 even when she didn't fall asleep until 11 pm.)  The Lord helped me to wake yesterday when my mom accidentally and unknowingly called me at 5 am my time when she was going into work-an unusual blessing.

2)   To a large degree, we hold the key to blessings from our Father, according to our faithfulness.  I love his perspective on faithfulness. Frequently we discuss faithfulness almost as a check list of commandments.  But he points out that we are to be "Faithful to ourselves, to the very best that is within us."  We ourselves were taught our first lessons in the premortal existence and to those truths that we know in our hearts we are to be faithful.  The very best that is within us is also our divine potential as we are the spirit children of God, our Heavenly Father.  As his children we possess divine qualities and character traits.  And as His children, and through the atonement of Christ we all possess the ability to return to our Heavenly Father, to become like Him.  That is what we need to be faithful to. Those are the things that are the very best within all of us. It's easy, so easy to loose sight of this when the world is constantly putting us down, trying to tell us we are less than, not good enough.  I love that Heavenly Father and His prophet haven't lost sight of our goodness within and our potential.  And gently, they  remind us of who we are to become.  Quite the contrast from the bombardment of noisy lies and misconceptions that come from the world and Satan.  And thus it brings me back to the point that I need to be up in the early morning, reading, and listening to that still small voice to guide me in these truths.

3)   President Hinckley.  This quote comes from President Hinckley.  The prophet that preceeded the current prophet, President Monson.  All prophets are called of God, I know that, but I loved President Hinckley.  And part of the reason why I felt so much love for him was because each time he spoke I felt so much love from him.  Even though he was the prophet for the whole world, all of those millions of people. It felt like he knew me individually.  It felt like he was praying for me.  He had that gift of God, the capacity to love everyone and for me to feel it.  It is how I imagine Christ is.  With so many people that have lived on this earth from Adam to now, Christ is able to know each one of us, individually, he knows what our pains, concerns, weaknesses, strengths, and desires are. Christ loves us and we can feel it.  President Hinckley was a great example to me of this Christ-like love.  So when President Hinckley says, "Be faithful to him. He is the one true source of your strength. He is your Father in Heaven. He lives. He hears and answers prayers. Be faithful to God."  I believe it, even when my faith is weak, because I feel that love from him and I know that it comes from God.

Check out my next posting on "And Walk in the Paths of Virtue" (D & C 25:2).

What is My Will?

Today's lesson is “I Seek Not Mine Own Will, but the Will of the Father”.  I have been evaluating myself recently on the subject of pride and have been recognizing how my pride had influenced my decisions to my detriment.  Here are some quotes from the lesson that are giving me insights into moving forward with no regrets.

"When we seek God’s will, we follow a course in which there will be no failure."

"There is a course for every person to pursue in which there will be no failure. It will apply to temporal as well as spiritual matters. The Lord has given us the keyword in these verses that I have read from the Book of Doctrine and Covenants:

“If your eye be single to my glory, your whole bodies shall be filled with light, and there shall be no darkness in you, and that body which is filled with light comprehendeth all things. Therefore sanctify yourselves that your minds become single to God.” [D&C 88:67–68.]"

I want to be filled with light and comprehend all things, or even just more than I understand right now.  This scripture tells me how I can be filled with light and filled with happiness--seek God's will first in all things.

Even our Savior, Christ the Lord, our perfect example said:  “I can of mine own self do nothing.” [John 5:30.]

Lorenzo Snow commented:

"It is remarkable that the God who made the worlds, who came down here clothed with flesh, performed mighty miracles, and sacrificed his life on Mount Calvary for the salvation of the human family—that He should say,“I can of mine own self do nothing.” And He goes on to say:

“As I hear, I judge: and my judgment is just; because I seek not mine own will, but the will of the Father which hath sent me.” [John 5:30.]

That is a wonderful saying, and there is a great deal in it. Now, what we want is to have that spirit in every act of our lives and in every undertaking, whether temporal or spiritual, and not think of self. We should try to ascertain how we should spend the money and the information that God has given us. The answer is simple—for the glory of God. Our eye should be single to the glory of God. That is what we left the other life for and [came] into this. We should seek to promote the interests of the Most High God, and to feel as Jesus felt, “I can of mine own self do nothing.” Inasmuch as we act today and tomorrow, this week and next week, in the interest of God, and have our eye single to His glory, there can be no failure.2 "

I need to make sure that my prayers aren't just a laundry list of things that I need, but instead ask God how I can be in His service and what is His will.  A couple of weeks ago I recognized that service was missing in my life.  I hadn't been serving others as I could because I was too busy or couldn't afford it.  I realized how many blessings and feelings of goodness I was missing out on and how I had also prevented the Lord from blessing others by avoiding these opportunities.  It's true that I was busy and money was tight, but I realized that my faith was not sufficient to believe that "all things are possible" through my Lord and Savior.  So about a month ago I began praying for opportunities to serve and told my Heavenly Father that I would accept these opportunities without hesitation. It was amazing how opportunities came at me everyday.  I was able to clean my friends house when she was sick and unable to. I was driving out of my neighborhood and saw my neighbor walking, clearly out of breath and struggling up the hill.  I'm so glad I recognized this opportunity and turned around and went back and asked her if she wanted a ride somewhere.  She said she was walking to the car repair shop to pick up her car.  She had only accomplished a few hundred feet and had another mile or two to go.  She climbed in my car and we were there at the shop in 3 or 4 minutes. This walk would have taken her an hour or more.  It was on my way to where I was going and wan't even an inconvenience at all, but I recognized what a huge help it was to her that day.  And I felt joy that I could help my Heavenly Father.  With my kids' school year coming to an end my busyness exploded with all the end of the year parties and field trips.  Writing this today has helped me recognize that I have fallen back into the trap of busyness and have once again missed opportunities to serve.  I need to seek out these opportunities again in prayer.